India’s Election Commission has officially gone global. First, the protests against the Election Commission were held in India. Then came London, with Germany-based YouTuber Dhruv Rathee taking the campaign against Chief Election Commissioner Gyanesh Kumar to Parliament Square. Then a protest was held at Union Square in New York City.
Now that the continents of Asia, Europe, and North America have been covered, surely the next logical destination is Africa, and there, the country of Wakanda.
Why stop at London and New York only, when the entire world must apparently be informed about India’s electoral controversies? Wakanda has advanced technology, a powerful king and enough vibranium to manufacture a billion microphones. Surely, it can spare a few hours to discuss Indian voter lists.
The proposed demonstration will reportedly demand the CEC’s resignation, an end to the SIR exercise, and immediate intervention from Black Panther. Sources close to absolutely nobody have confirmed that organisers are exploring whether Wakanda’s surveillance network can inspect Indian EVMs remotely.
The logistics should be fascinating. Protesters will need visas to a fictional country, placards that survive intercontinental travel and a reliable way to explain to Wakandans why an Indian constitutional controversy requires their urgent attention.
Perhaps the organisers could also approach the Avengers. Captain America could hold the Indian Constitution, Iron Man could conduct a technical audit of EVMs, and Thor could demand the CEC’s resignation with a thunderclap. Democracy would finally have the international task force it deserves.
Of course, there is one minor inconvenience, Wakanda does not exist, but when the objective is to make a domestic political dispute international, why should minor things like geography or reality become an obstacle?
The international itinerary could further keep expanding. London today, Wakanda tomorrow, perhaps Mars next month.
At this rate, the Election Commission might need a diplomatic passport just to defend itself.
And if the protest finally reaches Mars, Elon Musk may have to clarify whether the votes were counted by the Election Commission or by an algorithm.
Indian politics has gone global. The only remaining question is whether the next protest will need a passport or a spaceship.
